Do you often have negative traits?
Is it often in your life that you secretly wish something bad or tragic will happen to someone you know or even care for? Do you sometimes enjoy belittling and destructively criticizing people? Is it enjoyable for you to share terrible stories to others just to leave them feeling down and hopeless? Do you often feel jealous towards others and feel the need to possess them? Then maybe you are one of those negative persons and might consider changing these traits. Today, there are many negative people all around spreading toxicities to others to satisfy themselves. Some people are unconscious about it but there are also others who intentionally do it just to test other people’s limit and make them feel down. We are all not perfect and sometimes, we unknowingly or unintentionally do this to other people. But if you are aware of it and you don’t feel remorse or do it often and you think it is enjoyable, then, it must be really stopped. These negative traits will never help you elevate and evolve in life.
Do you always seek to control others?
Have you consciously manipulated others or interacted with others while cleverly hiding your negative intentions or agenda? Do you feel like you always need to know your partner or your friend’s activities, whereabouts, and the people that they hang out with? Do you often ask them about everything without respecting their privacy and boundaries? Then you might be a person who is always seeking to control others. Whether you do it vocally or in subtle ways, consider changing this behavior before it’s too late as it is another kind of toxic personality. In extreme cases, there are people who are narcissists and sociopaths who do not feel remorse about it and always seek to justify their bad behaviors towards others. In psychology, it is believed that this is learned through “repetition compulsion”, a drive to re-enact a traumatic event that the person has experienced during childhood. People who are like this often impose control over their partners or their children.
Do you always playing the victim?
It is normal for us humans to feel self-pity as an emotional creature. Oftentimes, we try to be positive about it and find solutions and to end the circumstance that we feel are not helpful for our growth. Unfortunately, there are people who always feel that they are constantly being victimized by others or that the world is so cruel or bad towards them most of the time. Have you ever felt this way? Then you must change this because thinking that you don’t have power over your life makes you miserable and feeble forever. If you think you are like this and you notice that you often blame others for your unhappiness, it is time for you to face responsibilities and take control over your life. Also, you should stop your victim-mentality and your manipulation to others through their compassion for you. People who have victim-mentality often, consciously or unconsciously, prey on others feelings to suck their energy, time, and even money. In other circumstances, they often self-destruct and put themselves down even when you try to life them up. In addition, many of them act very defensive when you try to criticize them. This is a very destructive trait to oneself.
Are you a pathological liar?
Do you often lie to your friends or love ones to get what you want? Do you find yourself lying often even to small and mundane things? Then you must take this seriously and change it because you might be a pathological liar. Sometimes, it is normal to tell small lies because our brain is a very complex organ that functions in a very mysterious and sometimes ridiculously uncontrollable ways. In some circumstances, lie is also necessary to protect our life or to have safety against harm. Nobody is perfect, so the saying goes. But if we do it constantly just to protect our image or to manipulate others, then this can be a serious psychological issue. Most pathological liars are master manipulators and can easily lie straight to you without feeling guilty whatsoever. They also make up stories to gain sympathy or to bend others towards their will. So if you think you are one of these people, it is important to self-reflect and stop this toxic behavior. Pathological liars are very dangerous people and they can cause havoc to their family or their community.